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I finally hosted my first movie night this past Monday, and it was a success. Joining me were three pals (two in their early 30s, the other in his early 20s), who I used to work with at our local Blockbuster Video (a franchise store, not corporate); I resigned (on good terms) a few months ago, while they all still work there, part-time. The earliest they could get here was a little after 9pm (closing time at the store), so dinner wasn't an option. However, there were snacks a-plenty (potato chips, pretzels, soda, etc).

Though they all knew of my huge, ever-expanding DVD collection, only one of them had actually seen the shelves full of movies, and that was a few years ago, so they were in awe (even though at least two of them have substantial collections of their own). For the most part, there was no plan to the programming; I left it to them to pick what they'd like to see for the main feature.

The show started of with the three fake trailers from GRINDHOUSE, which are missing from the R1 discs of PLANET TERROR and DEATH PROOF: Rob Zombie's WEREWOLF WOMEN OF THE SS, Edgar Wright's DON'T and Eli Roth's THANKSGIVING. I got these off a Starz/Encore broadcast of the theatrical cut of GRINDHOUSE, and burned 'em onto a DVD-RAM. Good stuff, enjoyed by all. DON'T (my fave of the three) and THANKSGIVING (the only thing Eli Roth's done that I've enjoyed... maybe fake trailers are his true calling) went over particularly well.

Next were some circa-1984 TV commercials culled from some of the earliest vcr recordings I ever made, of a late-night broadcasts of WOR-9's FRIGHT NITE and WABC-7's run of the syndicated HAUNTED HOLLYWOOD (featuring the voice of John Carradine) movie slot. Some were local, others regional/national. These bits of nostalgia were often funnier (especially the cheapjack local ads) than most scripted comedy. They included:

* ELDEE TV and Appliances, featuring "Chairman of the Board", Joseph Lombardi, Sr. (looking like a supporting character on THE SOPRANOS), who was apparently over-coached on using hand gestures to emphasize points he was making... literally every syllable of every word spoken had its own individual bit of hand language. "If you are a senior citizen or union member, come in for your free warehouse pass NOW! All our GE merchandise is CLEARLY MARKED with one low price!". His scary wife gets into the act at the end of the second ad: "At EL-DEE, we make buying TV and appliances SIMPLE!", emphasizing "simple" with outstretched arms, which I always assumed was the international symbol for "more", not "simple".

* WPLJ Power 95... "You've got the power!" lightning strikes the station logo, startling a Charlie Weaver-ish geezer living in a star-shaped portion of the logo.

* EASY PICKINS very 80s women with big 80s hair wearing 80s clothes doing a photo shoot set to very, very 80s synthesizer music (surprising that no one is shown doing "The Robot" dance), the only lyric: "Eaaaaaaaaasy Pickins!".

* Dr. Pecoraro - Chiropractor... imagine Ron Jeremy in a lab coat and heavy eyeliner, zonked on thorazine in a fake office set, his sales pitch ("Consultations are just $5") filled with awkward pauses and odd emphasis. He ends the first of his two ads by saying, defensively, "Millions use chiropractors every year", in a manner where you'd expect him to follow with, "--really, they do! Don't laugh! It's true... I'm not joking!". Dr. Pecoraro never blinks in his ads, not even once.

* REED ST. JAMES Menswear, also very MTV 80s... the jingle: "So tell me, tell me, tell me... who is this Reed St. James? *Bomp-BOMP*"

* A creepily obsessed Zora (LET'S SCARE JESSICA TO DEATH) Lampert for GOYA Beans... "Goya! Oh-boya!"..."Sazon!"

* A PSA by the little robot girl from SMALL WONDER, in-costume, asking us to be kind and understanding to those with hearing problems. I was waiting for a WESTWORLD moment that never came...

* Future AMC host Bob Dorian, shilling for PARSONS MEDPLEX Cosmetic Surgery Hospital, in an ad produced prior to the movie channel's debut. I suspect this was made as early as the late 1970s (Dorian looks a bit younger than his early AMC days), and just run continuously for years afterward.

* Telly Savalas for the BOYS CLUB (helps keep kids off the streets, away from temptations like pool halls, etc), and then--

* Telly Savalas for PLAYERS CLUB (now that you're of age, kid, save on drinks, food, hotel rooms in Atlantic City, Reno, Vegas, Lake Tahoe...")

* MCA Home Video's ad campaign, "Be a movie mogul!"...in which a mousey guy in glasses looms over his kitchen counter of pre-record tapes: "Get 20 movie hits on VHS, like-- SMOKEY & THE BANDIT...JAWS...SOMEWHERE IN TIME...THE BLUES BROTHERS...NIGHT HAWKS...ANIMAL HOUSE...THE STING! --for just $24.95 MSRP each at your local video store, and you too can be a movie mogul!"

* CRAZY EDDIE, with Jerry Carroll catching a thrown foam-rubber model of the Empire State Building, as he announced "Attention MANHATTAN! CRAZY EDDIE is coming to 150 Broadway! It's the GREATEST Grand Opening supersale EVERRRR! Free CRAZY EDDIE t-shirts and baseball caps! Our prices are IN-SAAAANE!"

* CARVEL Ice Cream, with raspy voice of founder/owner Tom Carvel thanking the public for 50 years of their patronage. Another featured the voices of a flirty gal and her nerdy mate for Carvel's "Thinny-Thin" dietary frozen dessert.

* DRUCKER DISCOUNT WAREHOUSE, a NJ-based electronics dealer. In the ad, a hard-boiled gumshoe (which might possibly be an early gig for stand-up comedian Tommy Sledge) cases the DRUCKER showroom. The owner tries to glom onto the CRAZY EDDIE vibe by closing the ad with "At DRUCKER'S our prices are so low, it's a STEAL!"

* Bill Cosby for JELL-O Gelatin Pops, switching his pop from one hand to the other.

* Keith Van Horne, billed only as "Famous Football Player" for WONDER BREAD, which builds strong bodies 12 ways, one of which apparently involves ordering a "I'm a Wonder Kid" t-shirt for $2.99 plus 2 proofs-of-purchase.

It took awhile for the gang to pick a movie-- a combination of being overwhelmed by choice and being open to almost anything they haven't already seen --but finally settled on the unsettling documentary, TREKKIES (1997), which I subsequently told them was easily the scariest film I own. Besides myself, only one of the group had seen it before. The other two wondered if they needed to know anything about STAR TREK to "get" the film, as they aren't fans of the show, but we assured them they didn't.

Though harmless, many of the fans featured in the film are a scary bunch indeed, taking things much...too...far... Jaws dropped in disbelief when a fan dressed as a klingon made the winning bid of $1400 for a foam-rubber forehead appliance at a convention. Or the Trek-themed dentist, who convinced his wife (whose forced smile speaks volumes), family and employees to dress the part every day. Or the klingon language camp. Or the teenager (actually quite a talented computer animator) with the annoyingly affected voice. Or the woman who was on the Whitewater jury, who thinks she's a starfleet commander, going to court every day in her uniform.

Since we all had work to do the next day, and I hadn't planned out the programming, we couldn't do a double feature this time, so I rounded out the evening with some assorted trailers from the Synapse disc, 42ND STREET FOREVER VOL. 2 - THE DEUCE:

SAVAGE! (at first, they thought this was another fake trailer, since I didn't tell them what I had put in the player)
KENNER
HELL'S ANGELS ON WHEELS
THE HELLCATS
THE CURIOUS FEMALE
THE BABYSITTER (they didn't know they made flicks like this in the 1960s!)
STREET GIRLS
COLLEGE GIRLS
THE POM-POM GIRLS (they instantly recognized Robert Carradine in the cast)
HELGA
INVITATION TO RUIN
PICK-UP
DELINQUENT SCHOOLGIRLS

At that point, a little after midnight, the guys had to go (one of them had to go to the DMV in the morning). But a good time was had by all (lots of laughs), and they seemed to be game for more in the near future, schedules permitting. I plan to program the next one; maybe a double-feature of FASTER, PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL! and THE MIGHTY PEKING MAN.